It is now that my life is mine.


In this article, I’m going to tell you one of the greatest secrets of life and how to find what you have been searching for. I believe we all have learned to put on a fake persona and to not be who we really are. We have learned that it’s scary to be who we really, and it’s a lot safer to act “normal” and fit it.  I’m grateful that I gave up all the layers of who I was not to find the real me and to be able to live for myself and no else.

Why would we put on a fake persona? The short answer is fear—fear that people won’t like the real you, so we change to fit in. The long answer is we have learned growing up, and been conditioned to believe, that we weren’t enough and someone or something outside of ourselves will make us feel enough and be worthy.  There are a lot of corporations out there making a LOT of money on products that they convince you will make you enough.

I started this article by telling you I was going to tell you one of the greatest secrets to life and how to find what you have been searching for. And you made it this far—congratulations—because it is really ingrained in our psyche to follow the status quo and not listen to the truth inside us. This secret and what you have been searching for is YOU. That might be a little bit of a letdown because it’s not a pill, but it is one of the greatest truths you will ever know.

girl and daffodils

Yes, loving yourself unconditionally. That means loving everything about yourself right now and being grateful for who you are. There is no one and nothing out there that will make you feel loved or enough. You must believe it yourself—no one and nothing can prove it and convince you. (Now, please start at the beginning of this paragraph and read it five times.) I just told you one of the most important things you will ever know and your mind is probably saying, It can’t be this simple. Remember this. Put this knowledge in your toolbox for life.

Guess what? It is that simple. No job, spouse, friends, car, house, jewelry, and “success” will be able to tell you you’re enough until you believe it yourself. Where we lose ourselves is when we go through life looking for validations that we are worthy to be on the planet. There is not enough of hearing: You did great job, you look good, thank you, you’re successful and beautiful. You must believe this yourself.

Are you ready to unlearn what you have learned and know the truth that you are more than enough?

  1. Live for yourself. Does that sound selfish? If it does, that’s the programming you learned. No worries—this used to bother me, too. I’m not talking about the egoistical of me, me, me, and you forgot your kids are a huge part of your life. What are some things you could start doing for you and put yourself first? Think of some things you always wanted to do and Do This could mean saying no to things and people that are no longer serving you. No one can do this for you; you have to know you are worthy.
  2. Right NOW realize you are enough. Not when you lose 23.38 pounds and fit into that outfit, not when you get that promotion, not when everyone likes you for being rich, famous, and successful, not when you become more enlightened, spiritual, peaceful, and loving, and not when you get the new car and new house. RIGHT NOW!!
  3. Talk and treat yourself like you would a 3- or 4-year-old.
  4. Now for the weird stuff, because this could be definitely outside your comfort zone. Look in your eyes in the mirror every day and say, I love you and I believe in you.
  5. Everyday tell yourself one thing about yourself that you’re grateful for. Start today.

 I just shared with you one of the most important to things to changing your life. What will you do with it??


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 I have an everyday religion that works for me. Love yourself first, and everything else falls into line.

~Lucille Ball